Friday, December 29, 2006

jealousy is sometimes a good thing

Okay. I am officially jealous.

How come Dawn gets so many presents for her birthday (which incidentally isn't even here yet)? Many presents nevermind, but a Tiffany & Co. present?!!!

I OSO WANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*turns dark green*


So, why i don't have?!!!

Being bo liao, i decided to go check out the number of friends on our Friendster list.
I have a total of 379 friends vs Dawn's 347.

*side track - we have a total of 92 common friends lor. wah!!!

Anyway, logically speaking...i should be the one who receives more presents!!!!
Which thus leads to the conclusion it's not the number of friends that matters.


I am so sad. Everyone likes Dawn better than me. *pout*

Must be because:


Dawn vs Audrey

Patient vs Impatient
Nice on her blog vs Rude, bitchy and sarcastic on my blog
Good tempered vs Bad Tempered

aiya...don't want to say liao la. Get more demoralized only.

But understandable lah...by the fact that I like dawn means everyone should like dawn. It's a known fact that I am a picky, judgemental and superficial person maaaaa....

Anyway, Early happy birthday, Dawn!!!
 Thanks for being my friend.


I'll see you at Union soon.

XxX,

audrey at 16:22

8 lamb droppings




Thursday, December 28, 2006

a leopard never changes its spots

So much for Singtel.

I am already starting to regret signing on with Singtel again.
Yea, being a sell-out sucks.

Anyway, case in point is that the TV has not arrived and I am pissed.
I didn't paint my room, pack it up, put up the curtains just for fun okay! And I have a spanking new sound system just waiting to be plugged in.

Damn Singtel.

Anyway, here's my complaint letter to them...which I very much doubt they will reply.


Have tried to call the hotline numerous times and left my number for my
call to be returned but have not heard from anyone to date.

I wish to know when will the Sony Bravia TV be delivered. Understd that
the TV should reach me 7 working days upon successful installation. I have not
received it.

Have called Sony/people delivering TV and they told us that THEY HAVE
NOT RECEIVED ANY INSTRUCTION FROM SINGTEL TO DELIVER ANY TV. Why is this
so?

I do not wish for the TV to arrive when nobody is at home. I do not
want to go to some collection centre to retrieve it because of lousy planning
and bad logistics on Singtel's part.

Pls inform me ASAP WHEN THE TV IS COMING SO I CAN DO SOME
PLANNING.


Sigh. Those assholes.
Too bad I'm cheap and can be bought over with a TV. I guess it's as much my fault as their.

But still, those Singtel assholes!

XxX,

audrey at 17:18

1 lamb droppings




young love

Recently, alot of my friends have gotten attached or at least, are in the process of getting attached...which is damn exciting lor, to say the least.

All I wanna say is...I hope the gossip is true (yea, for once) and that the scandal will become more scandalous!!!

It's really fantastic to be able to pick and choose you know.


hehehe

So my dear girl, pick and choose away!!! At most I go comfort the guy who got left behind only ma.

:D

XxX,

audrey at 15:02

0 lamb droppings




Wednesday, December 27, 2006

a trend and some resolutions

Okay, thanks to the earthquake in TW, the Internet has been down all day. This post has been sitting in draft mode for the longest time. But now that more than less is working now...let me proceed with the post of the day.


~~


Is it now a trend to apply makeup on the train? I saw another girl today doing it...but she was more successful than the last candidate. At least there were some results.



Anyway, end of year is coming and so it's time for resolutions.



1. I will stay away from online shopping.
2. I will resist temptations put forth by Dawn.
3. I WILL save money.
4. I will take zsa zsa out more and help her overcome her ridiculous doggy
fear of the unknown.
5. I will try cultivate patience.
6. I spend more time at home with my Bravia and sound system to develop closer bonds with my siblings and family.
7. I will not work hard.
8. I will continue to be gossipy and bitchy so this blog remains interesting.


Okay. 7 resolutions. Good enough to get me going.

Anything you think I should add????

XxX,

audrey at 18:27

4 lamb droppings




present

Taking advantage of the fact that the iMac (yea, newly bought...upon my bro's insistence and my mom's lack of willpower to stand up to constant bugging) has in-built bluetooth...i'm blogging at home after work for once.

So, anyway, look what the dratted rain did to my feet!It made the color of my shoes run.
So I have had black feet.

Moving on and away from feet, ladies and gentlemen, I present...MY PRESENT!


Er, or the process of setting it up.
Or perhaps, more accurately, the process of JP setting it up.

I took one look at the wires and ran away.

haha.. Zsazsa hated the adjusting of the sound and snorted continuously. She had to be let out after awhile.

Okay, anyway...my mini home theatre system has been set up. Now, where my Bravia???

XxX,

audrey at 01:10

0 lamb droppings




Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Merry Xmas everyone!

I'm in high spirits today...mainly because of the fantastic Xmas presents i received this year.

Thanks Esther, for the lovely Ann Marino shoes, necklace and earring set and coffee gum. It was such a wonderful surprise to receive the present via airmail.

I LOVE the shoes btw.

Oh..and you guys may be wondering what I got for Xmas from JP?

Guess first lah...It's inside this box.

So happy. I LOVE IT!!! It's the best present ever!

Will take pictures of it after it has been set up properly. :D I can't wait!!!

XxX,

audrey at 11:51

7 lamb droppings




Sunday, December 24, 2006

the case of the giant and disappointing present

Guess what JP bought for the gift exchange at his friends' party yday?

Clues:

1. It's bigger than normal and is about the size of two human fists combined.
2. It's red.
3. It's smells nice.
4. It's very expensive (S$18.90) for such a specimen.
5. It aids digestion and keeps your teeth nice.
6. It was bought at Liang Court Meida Ya supermarket.




How?


Guessed it already?





Yup. It was a humongous apple from Japan.


But I think the girl who received the present was not too happy. I guess it sucks to get a fruit for your Xmas present.

I thought it was funny though. Hahahaha.


Anyway, she was really nice and after getting over her initial shock and disappointment (yea, shock and disappointment), told the host of the party to cut up the apple so everyone could try.

So I got to eat the apple! :)

Though honestly, it tasted exactly like any other normal apple. It just smelt more fragrant.
I definitely will not spend $20 on a apple and I advise you to just forget the idea too. :P


Oh, and Merry Xmas!!!

XxX,

audrey at 12:14

1 lamb droppings




Thursday, December 21, 2006

A riddle for you...

Guess what washed up from the dirty canal outside my office today during lunch?


Go on...make a guess..







Here's a clue; it's small and can move really fast.






:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:



Give up?



:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:





A crab was washed up this afternoon.

It nearly got run over by a car and was very angry after that. We (me and peggy) originally wanted to get a closer shot of the crab but decided against it since we would be attending our company's Xmas party tonight and getting pinched would be a real pain in the ass.


Besides, who would believe me if I told them i was pinched by a crab outside tan boon liat, right?

XxX,

audrey at 14:54

0 lamb droppings




Wednesday, December 20, 2006

A makeup lesson on the train

Okay, this morning on the train, i was very amused by a girl.
She was applying makeup in full view of all the passengers in the relatively crowded morning train.

Now, i find it a most uncomfortable undertaking to apply makeup anywhere outside of a toilet or my room. Isn't it really embarassing to admit to others (and strangers at that) that you need additional assistance in the beauty department?

Yea, i know. Makeup is fake as it is...But I don't need to let other people know exactly how fake is my fake! Strangers don't need to know where does my natural blush end and additional help starts!

Okay, anyway, back to the not-just-powdering-her-nose-but-donning-full-battle-gear girl.

When I got on the train at Jurong East and noticed this strange sight, the girl had already finished with her makeup base and was starting on her lashes.

Generally, (for the uninformed) ladies start with their makeup base, followed by foundation and then powder. They then do their eyes, followed by cheeks and finally the lips.
Yea, long process...but it's all in the name of artificial beauty!

Back to the girl who was starting on her lashes.

I was very amazed for the following reasons:

1. She took 10mins to crimp her very short lashes.
2. She didn't poke her eyes out with the lash curler
3. Her lashes were still in good order after 10 minutes of crimping.
4. There was no difference before and after the curling process.




After curling, she then proceeded to apply mascara to her lashes. She not just applied like 3-5 strokes per lash (least that's what I do.)



She:

1. Stroke on Lash Extension Solution 10 times.base.
2. Separate clumped lashes.
3. Stroke on Black Mascara
4. Separate clumped lashes.
5. Repeat steps 1 to 4 at least 3 times per eye.




Wow. And the best thing was...NO SMUDGES!!!! Power!!!

Okay, next up...the cheeks.

Usually, ladies just swipe the brush over the blush like 2 times to get the powder onto the brush and then just apply onto cheeks in a few deft strokes. If too red, rub off with tissue (I just use my hands cuz im lazy) or apply more powder.

Not this not-just-powdering-her-nose-but-donning-full-battle-gear girl.

She:

1. Dusted her brush onto the blush pot 2 times.
2. Knock off some blush onto the cap.
3. Pick up mirror
4. Brushed the blush onto 1 cheek 25 TIMES!!!
5. Repeat steps 1 to 4 at least twice per cheek.

Wah. After brushing her cheeks at least 100 times, i'm sure any redness is not caused by the blush.

By this time, my train had already reached Tiong Bahru. Time to get off.
I took one last look at her and decided that all her work was in vain.

She looked more or less the same as she was when she was at Jurong East.
Poor thing.




p/s: Apologies for the blur pictures. I do not have prior experience of being a voyeur.

XxX,

audrey at 12:23

0 lamb droppings




Tuesday, December 19, 2006

a not so boring trip


Okay, as promised, here are some pics of my desaru trip.


It was quite fun, save the fact that jp was kinda sick on the second day. But being the trooper that he is, he took part in most of our activities still.





Here's me and jp after our BBQ (i'm holding a speared sausage and jp's holding a glass of wine in case u cant tell).


My butt is white becuz the cheapo people at the hotel whitewashed the patio walls and I leaned on them. :(


We brought our own disposable BBQ pit and bbq-ed on the patio of our hotel room.
Hahahaha. We were on the first floor, of course.



I think we killed/cracked/charred a few floor tiles in the process though.


Anyway, here's me and my bro Jonathan on a rock at the beach.


Desaru's quite an okay place to go for a short weekend getaway actually.


Least the beach has NO SANDFLIES.



I HATE sandflies.





Okay, here's everyone holding hands. That's the only way to get everyone to jump at the same time for the camera.





Or so I thought.



With a lazy mom who cheats and an overzealous bf, i guess it's not quite possible to achieve a shot with everyone lifting off at the same time.





Moving on...









Here's a pic of a very excited jp and his mini hermit crab.

Don't know what's so great about the crab.
It's not even cute.

Actually, i think hermit crabs are very ugly.







I think they look like giant spiders with shells that live in water.


Ack.

And they are vicious little critters. See?


The mini crab is holding on to the camera case with it's pincers all on its own leh!
Ah.


And then, there were the vegetables. Don't know why...but the sand on the beach had some very interesting patterns on it.

My brother thought the the patterns looked like the Lothlorien forest (ala Lord of the Rings).

I just thought they looked like cai xim.

Overall, it was a good getaway.
Just all day relak relak.






Can't wait for February and Krabi!


XxX,

audrey at 11:20

1 lamb droppings




Thursday, December 14, 2006

the 3rd angel

Sorry guys...haven't updated my blog in a few days. Yes, that's what happens when you get pissed off by some blasted telco and terminate your internet at home.



Good news (well, i guess esp for those who read my blog during lunch) is, my internet is getting connected back on the 21st of this month. So, yea.



Anyway, cut a long story short. A big pile of stuff happened in the last week or so...





I, er, discovered that the white ball we use to hit other balls in pool has evolved and now has red dots on them.






Call me sua ku, but i all along thought the white ball was, er, white.



Apparently, the red dots are supposed to help the play tell the direction that the ball is spinning.


Hmm.





Next other happening thing is that i nearly got picked up at Union the other day. Even worse, the guy used one of the MOST pathetic pickup lines i ever heard in my entire life.



Oh, and the unspoken rule at Union is...you don't pick up girls at Union. You ask them to dance first, knock them out with your uber cool snazzy moves and then try getting fresh.


Ah whatever.


This is what happened.


There i was, sitting in the corner sipping my Perrier (if u didn't know, just about everyone else drinks Perrier or Evian at Union. You can't spin if you're drunk u know) when this guy just sidles up next to me. So i go thinking "Oh hey! Finally, some guy that i don't already know is gonna ask me to dance!". And then to my horror, he starts pointing at his table where there are 2 other girls (who incidently cannot dance for nuts because i was watching!) and tells me that those are his "Angels".




WTF?!!




Angels? How cliche and outdated is that?
For the record, those women looked nothing like angels.



Anyway, he goes on and on about how they (he, his other guy friends and the two remaining women) started off with 3 Angels and how 1 of the women had to leave (i bet she left cuz she couldn't take any more of the corniness) and so they were now down to 2 Angels.


Anyway, he then asked if I would like to be the 3rd Angel and join them.




HELOO!!!
The guy was asking me to be a substitute Angel.


And when I told him that I'd rather dance, he just repeated himself again.





The poor ass must have repeated him at least 3 times.
Sigh. I guess he was looking for a stupid 3rd Angel then.




Anyway, good thing Mr Almost Virgin decided to stick his obtuse nose in at the exact right moment and saved the day. Thank god for Johnny.

Phew.




Anyway, i'll end here.


Wanted to post some pics of me at Desaru but there's something wrong with jp's card reader and the pics are just not coming out.



I'll put them up soon! :)

XxX,

audrey at 20:41

4 lamb droppings




Thursday, December 07, 2006

my strange new colleague

I'm so going to burn in hell for talking about my colleague here...but i don't care.
This is about my strange new colleague whom i hope never reads this post.

Anyway, moving on...

I think he built a semi shrine for his gf.


Yes, a shrine.



No lah, not this type of shrine.

I meant the other type of shrine. The online kind.

I am scared of love-crazed-romantic-hopelessly-devoted-to-their-significant-other type of people.

And I find it so strange that a guy is keeping a weblog of activities he does with his gf.
If he were, like 13, i'd be totally okay with it. But he's not and there lies the problem.

Anyway, check his blog out if you like. He is Chiron. :P


XxX,

audrey at 13:49

3 lamb droppings




Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Xmas Decorations

With Xmas round the corner and Halloween decorations that expired more than a month ago still hanging from the ceiling...it's time for some Xmas redecoration for the office.

Yup. We're having another party in the office on the 19th. To celebrate Xmas this time.

But first, a sneak preview of the good things to come.

And here's a close up of Joel.
Priceless, isn't it?


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA.

XxX,

audrey at 17:34

1 lamb droppings




Monday, December 04, 2006

Sell Out

I have to eat my words. My vehement and angry curses at Singnet have turned around and bitten me hard in the ass.

I am signing up with Singnet again.

Yes, I'm a sell-out, i know.

Hey, they are giving away a Sony Bravia hi-definition 32 inch LCD TV okay?!!

Damn chio okay?!!!

I think Mich's constant exultation of Sony products actually rubbed off. The Bravis IS good. Right?

Hahahaha.

Whatever lah. I just want my TV.

----------------------------

Next up...

Wanna share with you guys this other kinda pervertic guy that I am aquainted with.
Note: AQUAINTED.

Don't ask me why I know such weirdos. Just be content with the fact that I share my juicy bitchy life with you.




Introducing....Dugii from Oz


He's this self-proclaimed sex expert cum fanatic (pardon the pun).
Here's an excerpt from his blog.


Go ahead. Knock yourselves out.


p.s: He dances salsa too. Just don't say it was me who told u so.

p.p.s: Yes, in SG Union SQ lah!

XxX,

audrey at 12:44

1 lamb droppings




Friday, December 01, 2006

Patience is NOT a virtue i have

Ooookie.
I am like super pleased with myself.

I finished Xmas shopping for jp in the span of 1 lunch break. Today.

Wahahaha.
Now I just need to tahan not giving him the present.
As Mark happily pointed out, I have 25 more days to tahan.

Special thanks to Mark, Twain and Peggy who helped me making my decision on what to get. Thanks people!!

-- -- -- -- --

Okay, gratitude aside, time now for my daily bitching.
Yea, bitchy blog. So???

Anyway, yday I came to the conclusion that the one virtue that I am seriously lacking is patience.
Jp, i am sure, agrees with me wholeheartedly.

So, for those of you out there who are convinced that i am bad tempered, you are wrong.
I am just short tempered aka impatient.

Hmm. Come to think of it, what is the exact difference between being bad tempered and short tempered?

If I am not good tempered, then I must be bad tempered, because there definitely is no "normal tempered" (Even-tempered refers to something else, you dodo, so don't even try that one on me!).

But I am certainly not bad tempered because it takes quite alot of get me really really mad (read: mad NOT pissed. They are different.).

So anyway, digression aside, I am short-tempered and I need to cultivate patience.

Cultivate patience.

Die. So difficult.
How to cultivate patience? Take deep breaths when some slowpoke takes his time and smile sweetly while you count to 10?

Wah, die lah. I hope i don't implode.

XxX,

audrey at 17:23

1 lamb droppings