Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Quit while you're still ahead.
Met one of mr mimosa's friends today...and i must say, she really epitomises the corporate slutty bitch. We met up for dinner at toa payoh and the minute she lay eyes on mr mimosa, her conquest for the night began. It was so bad i could hardly keep my dinner down
while keeping a fake smile plastered on my face.
I'd like to apologise for ranting here...but stomaching a slutty bitch is just a little more than i can take so i need an outlet somewhere.
I'm sorry. I don't usually bitchslap people on my blog but this is a real exception. I've never felt so disgusted in a very long time and i just need to let it out.
I mean c'mon, where's your dignity bitch?
Let me just count the ways you have mortally offended me.1) Stop trying to pass off your goldfish eyes as doe eyes. It just does
not work...especially if you're past
thirty. It only succeeds in giving people the creeps.
2) Stop flicking and touchyour hair as you're in a panteen advert. You are nowhere as pretty or slim as the model. Fuck, your skin is
porous..and your hair is brittle. And you really need to touch-up your rebonding. Take my advice, stay away from the cheap salons.
3) That said, you need to lay off the mascara. The spidery lashes just make your
goldfish eyes look worse.
4) Stop trying to suck up to my bf when I'm around. What am i...transparent?
5) Quit slanging. It makes you look stupid. Okay..make that
very stupid.
6) Don't pretend to be this helpless innocent maiden in distress who can't freaking split a plate of noodles. You're past the big 30, for god's sake! If you know how to smoke, how to paint your cyan toenails flawlessly and work in SPH, you definitely can cut noodles into half with a spoon. Even worse, you're old enough to be a mom. So stop insulting my intelligence with your thinly veiled haplessness.
*pui* Argh...just thinking about such people makes me sick. A disgrace to womenkind. No wonder we are constantly objectified. And it's all thanks for sluts like these. Fuck.
Don't these people know how to quit while they're still ahead?Stupid bitch.
P/s: Mr mimosa, this is how i
really feel. There.
XxX,
audrey at 21:12
Saturday, July 23, 2005
Am i alcholic? Hmmz...just polished off a bottle of ice wine with mich..and here i am typing..with plenty of typos. And mich is just being really amused at my constant hitting of the "delete" key to correct my errors. I think she's hoping that i'll be getting an epiphany of some sort or something. Haha.
Anyway, since im in a rubbishy sort of mood at the moment, i shall pose some rubbishy questions that you may consider to answer.
* btw, both me and mich think that there's
nothing wrong with drinking and getting semi sloshed in the day. it's pretty fun actually.
Anyway, here are my questions (i will give u my response in due time..that is, when the alcohol wears off and i can give u a more lucid answer) :
1) Why do guys get to throw their underwear into the washing machine when we, ladies, have to to hand-wash our own?
2) Why are G-strings called g-strings? They look nothing like the alphabet if u ask me.
3) Why are MOST men stupid?
4) Why can't men flush after using the toilet?
5) How come I spent 3 years in school and know nothing about what i studied?
6) How come i got myopia when my brothers have 6/6 vision?
7) How come when ladies put on weight and develop tummies they are labelled fat but when men put on weight, we tell them that their tummies are "cute" and they look more of a man than a boy? Bah.
okay..that's it. im leaving. ill get back to you when i get back to you. ciao.
XxX,
audrey at 16:15
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
guilt
I wonder how some people can do bad things and feel not the slightest prick on their conscience. It never fails to amaze me.
I can't.
Whenever i do something bad/wrong, i'd be so plagued by my conscience that all i'll be thinking of is owning up. Can't sleep, cant think of anything else and can do little else except live in the constant anticipation that i'd be found out real soon. Usually, the anticipation really gets me and i just give up.
Stupid thing to do, really, in this dog-eat-dog world of ours. Who gives a shit about what really happened, except who's going to take the rap.
XxX,
audrey at 13:25
Monday, July 18, 2005
To con a con-man
Im so impressed by the succinctness of esther's comment that i decided to do her the honour of further commenting on it here. Her comment was as follows:
"trying to find a man who flirts with many and hope he finds you a gem is stupid, just as trying to find love from a prostitute, if you think like that you deserve to be cheated just like the people who got conned , if they didn't get conned by A they will be conned by B, why? because they chose to be naive, they chose to believe without evidence. "Why...i believe this
perfectly sums up my fatalistic attraction for bad men. Suffered a major ouchy (really hit raw nerves there) when i read it but haha...and yes, i'll admit..i often
choose to be
naive and believe.
I guess it's really just the
ego talking whenever that happens. Ah really...i never thought i would be guilty of such stupidity...but then again i guess there's a first for everything. So maybe it's time for a major overhaul of my emotional works.
But on second thoughts, i'm actually quite happy the way i am so maybe i will just put the overhaul on hold for the moment. While it may
seem stupid to believe a player when he tells you he loves you...the trick is really to
pretend to believe at the start (so he'll be nice and also to give yourself a chance with the fella.) and then later
really believe when he has truly proven himself worthy.
I guess it's really like trying to con the con-man who is trying to pull a fast one on you.
While this may seem liken love to a game, we ought to face up to the fact that people are generally not too honest. You can never really know if the person you entrust your heart with is ever going to break it. People change.
I'm sure as hell meant it when i told my ex that i would love him forever...but i didn't..and couldn't. And i never ever mean to break anybody's heart. But i have. Sometimes...shit just happens.
So...really...isn't love just like a game whereby one strives to keep his/her heart intact in the best way he/she knows how? In my opinion, it's just easier to play the game by the usual rules to find "the one"..it's just not so painful when you look at the world in shades of grey.
XxX,
audrey at 01:22
Friday, July 15, 2005
are you open?
I was just thinking...in this time and age whereby everybody cheats on everyone else...why don't men and women just admit to their partners that all they really want is an
open relationship?To put it bluntly, wouldn't it just be easier to tell your bf/gf that what you are really looking for is to start a relationship but still want the freedom to see other people...instead of having to hide "the other"?
Maybe to serve our own
selfish needs, we choose to keep our
secret desires to ourselves in fear that our significant other will leave upon knowing the awful truth.
But how significant is our significant other if we, ourselves constantly think of another?And I don't really think the truth is that awful. At least it's the truth, and if i can't get honesty, there is no faith. Without faith, there can be no trust.
Personally,
I'd rather be in a god-honest open relationship where i know my bf is oogling and hanging out with other women than be kept in the dark and not knowing...trusting the bastard as he fucks someone else behind my back.
The real question is, would you rather choose to know what he's really thinking and doing or prefer the bliss of ignorance?
I must be either really modern to be willing to share...or just really fucked up.
XxX,
audrey at 18:56
commitment phobe
Was talking to mich over dinner today...and somehow our conversation led to the conclusion that i
am a
closet commitment phobe. Wow..that's news.
Me? Afraid of commitment? Whoever heard of a girl being afraid of commitment? Not that im being sexist here...but isn't it usually the case that the girl is the one in the relationship that wants to get hitched real quick? Hmm...Well, i never considered myself as one (as i do not embrace singlehood willingly as you guys can well attest to) but you never know...
Anyway, this is how our conversation went...
M: Y'know..i think you and alvin could really make it..
A: Huh?! (eyes big with disbelief...note the fact that the two do not get along particularly well so this coming from mich is a real shocker.)
M: As in like
married.* I laugh uncontrollably for a minute*A: WHAT?!! Married?! What the hell makes you say that?
M: Well, your parents like him well enough.
A: Er...so??? (there's no logical connection between the 2 sentences)
M: Well, he's acceptable.
A: (still not getting it at all) Erm, acceptable doesn't mean married, you know.
M: I think you suffer from commitment phobia.
A: WHAT?!!! (At this point, i started to think that the lack of sleep was really making mich delusional since there was link at all.)
M:
You pick all the guys who you know can't work out as serious long-terms and are only good as distractions, flings and time-fillers whom you will never bring home. Think about it.
And i did.
And guess what? I think she's
right.
In a really twisted and sick way, she's right.
Seemed illogical at first, but the more i thought about it, the more it made sense. Afterall, I've never really hankered after the nice guys...and so far only had my heart broken only once (and i had as much part to play in its destruction so that one time doesn't really count either). And i'm the one who usually initiates the breakup..so yeah..in some really warped and crazy way...she's right.
Gosh...does this mean that i need more help than im getting or is mich just messing with my head as usual? Hmm...
XxX,
audrey at 01:01
Thursday, July 14, 2005
lasik?
Mr mimosa is getting his eyes zapped and i am just so jealous. I can't think of anything else so here i am, wasting company time and blogging.
Sigh.
Some people just have all the luck.
XxX,
audrey at 12:22
Tuesday, July 12, 2005
life.
I wonder what would it be like to live my life as another person…and look at the world from a completely different perspective. Now…wouldn’t that be interesting?
Imagine me…as Lee Kuan Yew! Wahahaha!
What would it be like to be completely serious and nerdy…to stay home all day and do nothing but play computer games...know nothing about the opposite sex and possibly jerk off every night in desperation?
What if I was someone who looked at the world through rose-tinted glasses and await the day that my knight in shining amour will sweep me off my feet?
Erm, just in case u were wondering, I’ll admit that im somewhat
jaded and don’t believe in the perfect man/soulmate/happily-ever-after shit anymore.
This is, of course, not to say that I am unhappy…I am.
I’ve not been as happy or contented as I am now in a long time…but I think my perception of life has changed somewhat. I believe that I have finally found someone that I don’t have to dumb down for…and who is fun and entertaining to keep my wandering mind occupied.
But the most interesting thing about my new relationship is that I actually feel somewhat
insecure at times. Interesting because I next to never feel insecure in my past relationships…save one. Not that I think im god’s gift to mankind or any of that kind of bull, but I really never felt threatened before. Or maybe I was just blissfully ignorant (read: they lied). In anycase, it really kinda
amuses and irks me at the same time that I appear to be turning into one of those icky people.
Man oh man…what am i gonna do?
XxX,
audrey at 17:15