Monday, May 22, 2006

reflection

Was just lying in bed thinking yday night, and a good part of this morning, why did things come to an end? Like this?

My relationships always come to a grind. I am usually the one to end things...reason being that I cannot put up with the their nonsense anymore. And this has made me wonder...Perhaps it is really me who is the problem.

Not something that i'd like to admit to myself. What? Am i really so demanding and anal?

Sometimes i wonder how other couples can be together for years! In fact, i cannot quite grasp the concept of marriage. Am I really so unforgiving? Or do I just have too much opinion?

But I just can't help it. I can't help the fact that i dislike people who are not environmentally conscious, who respect nobody and have a holier-than-thou attitude. I hate it when the state of my day is of insignificant interest to him, i hate having to repeat myself time and time again and tire of people who are consistently late without apology. I hate it when he wants to play safe and do only the tried and tested. I hate stinginess and the kiasu mentality. I get pissed with people who put up a front, pretending to be someone or something they are really not.

As a rule, i think i'm starting to dislike most Singaporean men...with their extremely narrow and sheltered mindsets, and propensity for racism, stinginess and low tolerance for differences.

Not that all Singaporean men are like that. No, definitely not. But most.

And I am supposed to grit my teeth and bear it? The old-school chauvanism? I'm supposed to smile and pretend that i agree?

I'm sorry...i can't. My opinion is getting in the way...and i just can't smile and pamper some man's stupid ego just for kicks.

I mean, if he can't and won't do the same for me, why should i?

So i guess, i'm the kind of woman that men love to hate.

XxX,

audrey at 10:16

1 lamb droppings