Wednesday, May 10, 2006

quarter life crisis

I think there’s something wrong with me. I’ve been trying to implement a lot change in my life. Like major drastic changes.

Such as joining a gym (it’s considered a major commitment for me okay!), picking up salsa (something tt I used to think was for aunties but with which I am so totally into right now)…I even have decided that I’m going to pick up the bachata (on top of salsa), rock-climbing and get myself a “bao za” hairdo. Y’know…the tight ringlet kind? Those you see on ang moh baby’s head? Something like a mini afro…hahaha….Mad right? I probably will need to put a paper bag over my head every time I step out of the house after I do it.

But I’ve sort of given up on the idea of getting myself a tattoo. No real real real inspiration at the moment, so why put someone else’s design on my body?

I dunno what has led to all these changes…Maybe I am, as they say, suffering from a quarter-life crisis!!!

I just woke up one day and decided that enough was enough. No more mindless nights of TV, no more aimless shopping, no more getting puke-guts-out-drunk clubbing, no more! I have a life, and I am going to live it. As far as I know, my academic achievements count for nothing…and I am not (most unfortunately) totally in love with my job even thought I’m pretty much enslaved to it. I need achieve…something. Anything.

I think I’ve also gotten tired of being the “other half”. Afterall, you don’t need another person to complete yourself…you are a whole person in your own right. So yeah, I’m sick of having to do everything “together”, go everywhere “together”, to the extent of trying to think the same thoughts. I need to re-establish my own identity…I need to be me again.

And so, that’s what I am doing now, though I can’t say for sure, how “me” these changes really are.

XxX,

audrey at 15:12

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