Saturday, October 22, 2005

Rainy days...

It's been raining consistently over the last few days...and which I am certain, has contributed significantly to my cold and melancholy mood.

For those who fear and/or detest long rambly posts about nothing, i would encourage you to stop reading right now. Becuz this is one of those days when being bored out of your mind makes you nostalgic and somewhat melancholy (the rain helped, somewhat). Yes, i'm bored out of my mind and therefore nostalgic and hence blogging.

Today's a Friday...so technically, it's the happiest day of the week...being the start of the weekend. Yet, why does it feel so much like the beginning of the end?

Think it all started when i gave mich my namecard this evening. It felt surreal. It finally hit me that i have officially entered adulthood...and that means no more excuses. No more zao-ing, no more "I had no idea", no more "whatevers".

Shit. How did the funnest part of my life pass me by, and I not know it?

I always thought it was cool to have your own namecard, but now that i have my own...they just remind me of the death of my adolescence and school days. In the past, there was always someone to take responsibility for me. In school, my teachers were the ones entrusted with the task of making me learn. At home, my parents were to nurture and provide for me until I grew my own wings.

But the thing is, how did i manage to miss the sprouting of my own wings??!

It really sucks to know that if i don't succeed in life, it's only because of me. Not because of circumstances, nor others...but myself.

That's pretty shitty if you ask me...and a damn lousy way to feel at the start of the weekend.




XxX,

audrey at 00:19

3 lamb droppings