Friday, April 04, 2003
hieeeeeeee....
Okay, i got my tag board up, not much business though. :( Anyway...
Its kinda weird cuz while im totally unprepared for my exams, and should be scared as hell right now becuz i dunno anything, i am actually happy that my exams will be coming soon. I think i got the "the sooner they're over, the better attitude". So much for my honours.
Speaking of honours, i seriously wonder what it'll do for me. What i do know is that it will increase my pay by a few hundred (assuming i get like at least 2nd upper) but what good will it
really do? I'm not even sure what do i want to do. You know, i really wish i had the guts and/or passion to pursue a really funky career like theatre (passion) or be an entrepreneur (guts). Unfortunately, i fall short of
both! That's really quite sad. I really hope i don't end up working in an office for the rest of my life, having to contend with difficult collegues and/or boss. I think i'll just die
.
I have always wondered how the so-called "delinquents" of society pluck up enough guts to do what they do. Like, how can they just run away from home when they know that this move may adversely affect their future? And how can they submit so totally to their passion, throwing caution to the wind? At times, i really admire their pluck.
i think these "ah bengs and ah lians" are really social labels; meaningless, useless, rude and stupid social labels recklessly given out by educated people who are ironically
ignorant of
real street culture and values. Actually, sometimes i get kinda mad
for these bengs and lians (like now). Admittedly, some of these bengs and lians do deserve such labels because they
are gangsters but i feel that the majority of them are really misunderstood. While i do not condone many of their actions (yes, i think staring incidents are childish and stupid, but hey! staring is so
passe!), i feel that they have many other qualities are really quite admirable. Please don't get me wrong and think that i am an "ah lian wannabe" as you read this. I am not. But then again, that really depends on your definition of ah lian...i sincerely hope your definition of an ah lian is not so narrow that it includes all girls who wear fitting, cheena clothes..if so, i guess maybe u should stop reading this blog right now..
Im angry because people (especially the educated) condemn them as useless, uncouth, irresponsible and stupid just because of a label. I think it is horrible that they are condemned because they are not academically inclined. I am also angry that because of stereotyping, many of them are not getting the chance that they deserve. I think it is so ironic that even the very educated fall into the trap of sterotyping. I thought that education would broaden one's horizons of life but i have been proven wrong. I think it is all very well that we can sit in our classrooms and discuss how terrible discrimination is, but yet we practice it in our daily life. Like, how often have we thought "oh, he's so beng...i bet he wouldn't be able to understand what is XX."
What i admire about these people is that they are down to earth, friendly and sincere. Of course, this is not applicable to every beng and lian you come across, but i would say it is pretty applicable to most of them. If anything else, at least they are not pretentious. I hate the PR-ing we have to do. Call me bias, but i really feel that many people in school (especially in the Uni) are kinda materialistic and superficial. Im sorry if this blog offends you but this is how i feel. Im really hoping that i'll be proven wrong soon.
Uh..actually i got lots more to say, but no time to say it, think i'll continue on my next blog...see ya!
XxX,
audrey at 20:56